Friday, November 24, 2006

Al O’Limerick


Wherein I try my hand, not once but frice... er, force?... four times, at an auncient Irish verse form as time-honoured and venerable as the beloved Shamrock Shake:

1. The Moistened Pedagogue
Malaysia: a substitute teacher
had sweat as a notable feature.
He sweated all day
tried to wipe it away
Others said, “what a damp, smelly creature.”

2. Customs Officials
or
Sure, Use Up an Entire Page of My Passport for One Stamp, You Stamp-Happy Ass

When traveling in Indonesia
The visa fee might well displease you
It’s thirty-five bucks
yet the government sucks…
Where’s that money go after they squeeze you?

3. Formatting Fatigue
I find it a tedious trial
to write things in APA style.
I forgot to indent
and down my grade went
I’ll be angry about it a while.

4. Bistromath
When having a restaurant luncheon
The math at the end doesn’t function.
When your friends add their share
the result’s far from fair
And you stifle the impulse to punch ‘em.

2 comments:

Tam said...

Hilarious Alex! I actually laughed out loud at a couple of your limmericks. And it's true about the visas! And I've found that for the most part, the smaller the country, the bigger the passport visa/stamp. Perhaps there's something Freudian about that?
Also, for your papers' bibliographies, use noodle tools. Much simpler. Wish I had it while I had to do all that.

albtraum said...

Thanks Tam! It was harder than I thought to come up with limericks. You have to make the lines go

da DA da da DA da da DA da

and for some reason that seemed really tough to me. i think the meter's still off on a couple of them. oh well practice makes perfect.